In the kitchen, Declan Ganley and Leo Varadkar are huffing and puffing on Pat Kenny about a Euro referendum.
Having called the public mad, Enda is hiding somewhere in the attic with Gilmore, disguised in green jersies and looking like the two idiots from the 11 8 50 ads.
And wth no-one watching the stables, Sarkozy and Merkel have ensured that our horses have long since bolted.
Our referendum about our continued participation in Europe was held in February of last year, when we voted in the general election.
At a time when real leadership was needed, we voted in a weak coalition of no vision and chose the path of compliance and austerity.
For reasons best known to themselves, they cling grimly to the upturned hull of austerity and poverty for all.
Maybe they have been promised great riches in the next life, if only they inflict great misery in this one.
We didn’t consider any of the other alternatives viable. Gilmore for Taoiseach is even more laughable now than when the idea was first mooted, and we have not come so far that we could forget the sins of Sinn Féin and give them a say in the running of the country.
David McWilliams, Dunphy and the others were a false dawn, and by a process of elimination we were left with the curent collection of dunces.
I don’t believe it for a second, but maybe Varadkar is right.
Maybe refernda aren’t democratic.
Maybe the Irish people are just no use at democracy.
Maybe, as Noonan says, we should all just change our lifestyles and leave the country entirely.
Don’t let the stable door hit you on the way out.